It's been a hard weekend. Lonely and long. Friends have been busy and my body's been fighting off some gnarly sickness. Like most people, my insomnia kicks in big time when I'm sick. I fall asleep at inconvenient times (hey 3pm) and wake up when it's dark outside.
As a seasoned wide awake at 1am gal, I'm familiar with this space. I'm familiar with nights that feel endless and lonely, and how quickly both of those feelings become dangerous. Because when your brain won't stop running while the world is sleeping, it will run away to scary places. We're the biggest threat to ourselves when we think we're the only ones.
So what do we do when the city is dark and your bedroom light is on? You start counting all the good. You take stock of the people you love and the ones who love you back, and let go of those who can't. You create something new. Write a blog (heyo!), edit a photograph, redecorate your living room, make a card for your mom (she'll love it) - do whatever you can that reminds you of your ability to bring something creative into the world. You clean your house. Do your dishes, hang your clothes up, use your night owl energy to beautify your space. Trust me, you'll feel better when you wake up at 7am to go to work (tired and groggy) and your kitchen is clean.
Whatever you do, don't let the early morning hours get the best of you. Recognize them for all the magic they offer. For the stillness and quiet that the world is giving you. It is a special kind of gift. When you are mad at your body for refusing to sleep, take it as a sign you've got things to do and the world just can't wait for you to do them.